Let Go to Gain Everything

"There is this idea that you must know your plan, your direction, and your outcome before you even begin. That you must have all the answers or have it all figured out. This is a myth. To surrender is to be open to what you don't know. To surrender is to stop trying to force your way. Surrender is the art of allowing. So that there's space for the universe to show up."

– Kute Blackson, The Magic of Surrender

For years, I approached business like most entrepreneurs—with a death grip on the steering wheel. I knew exactly where I was going: how much money I'd make, by when, and precisely how I'd get there. I reverse-engineered every decision to achieve these predetermined outcomes. Control was my currency, and I spent it liberally.

There's comfort in this approach. It feels responsible, strategic, and safe. After all, how could anyone build a successful business without a clear vision of the end result? The alternative seemed reckless—simply flowing with no destination in mind? What about supporting my family? What about security?

The Achievement Paradox

The first time I launched a business, I had less than $1,000 to my name. I was terrified but determined. I envisioned a future where I'd make over $100,000 per month in profit—a goal that seemed almost laughably ambitious at the time. The critical difference back then was that I didn't actually know if it would come true. I had no evidence that what I was going after would necessarily materialize. This uncertainty, this not-knowing, made the journey both terrifying and exhilarating.

Looking back, something interesting was happening beneath all that planning. Despite my illusion of control, there was a necessary surrender taking place. I had to trust the process. I had to leap without knowing if the net would appear. And that mystery made everything feel alive with possibility.

Then something unexpected happened: I achieved my financial goals. I hit the targets I'd been obsessively working toward. But instead of feeling fulfilled, I felt... empty. Borderline depressed, even as my bank account swelled.

Why? Because achieving such a significant goal made me realize something profound: life follows a formula. Whether you want the best relationship, the ideal job, or a specific income, it's all just a series of steps you can replicate. If you have a specific goal and your "why" is big enough, you can achieve practically anything.

And in a strange way, knowing this made life less satisfying, not more. Once I understood that the world operates on these predictable principles, it actually became a bit boring. The mystery was gone. The wonder of not knowing if something was possible had disappeared.

The Dopamine Trap

I could easily set my sights on $100 million now. And I know—with absolute certainty—I could achieve it with enough determination. This realization stripped away the magic. Every goal, from career milestones to relationships, became just another predictable dopamine hit waiting at the finish line.

Even your morning coffee follows this pattern. Life becomes a series of achievements and rewards, each one more fleeting than the last. And when you see through this cycle, when you recognize that almost anything is achievable with enough persistence, the whole game starts to feel hollow.

To be clear—I'm not saying earning $100 million would be easy or simple. Far from it. My "why" would need to be enormous, and I'd have to give every ounce of my being to make it happen. Let's not sugarcoat how intense that journey would be. And honestly, I don't resonate with such money-driven goals—I'm not chasing that particular number. But that's precisely my point: if the motivation was there, like it was during my first business venture, it could be done. The formula works. That's all I'm saying.

This doesn't mean I've stopped pursuing things—I'm still human, after all. But I've developed a deeper awareness that no achievement, no matter how impressive, will ever bring lasting satisfaction if it's pursued from this mindset of control.

The Ultimate Surrender

This realization led me to the only pursuit that offers genuine fulfillment, though I wouldn't even call it a pursuit.

Surrender.

Not surrendering as in giving up, but surrendering as in letting go of the desperate need to control every outcome. Being fully present in each moment. Trusting that you don't have to worry about everything your ego-brain is constantly warning you about. Connecting deeply with something greater than yourself—call it God, the Universe, or whatever resonates with you.

This path of surrender means releasing the illusion of control, which paradoxically brings back that mysterious feeling I experienced when I first started out—except now it's intentional. That not-knowing, that trust in the process while living fully in each moment, has become the ultimate vibe in my life.

Is it scary? Absolutely. There's profound vulnerability in releasing control, in not having every step mapped out. But I've found there's also profound freedom.

A New Approach

Now I'm taking a different approach to life and my business (though I'm not even sure I want to use that word "business" anymore—it feels too constraining for what I'm creating). Instead of meticulously defining exactly what I want and forcing my way there, I'm practicing surrender each day. I'm allowing the universe to work through me, giving me signals about what needs to be done right now, and trusting that everything else will fall into place.

When I catch myself trying to micromanage the future, I gently bring myself back to the present moment. What needs my attention right now? What is trying to emerge through me in this moment? How can I be of service today?

I no longer believe that success comes from controlling everything. Instead, I'm discovering that true success might be measured by how fully we can release control while staying engaged with life—how completely we can trust while still showing up.

The paradox is this: in surrendering control, I've discovered a peace that no achievement could ever provide.

This is my invitation to you—not to abandon your dreams or goals, but to hold them differently. To pursue them with open hands rather than clenched fists. To trust that there's a wisdom working through you that knows more than your planning mind ever could.

The deepest fulfillment isn't found in controlling life, but in dancing with it. And that dance begins with surrender.